Why "Structure" Is Often Just Control in Disguise
We have been convinced that without a rigid schedule, children will fall into chaos. But structure and control are two very different things.
When I was homeschooled, my life had plenty of structure. We ate at certain times, we had chores, we had community commitments, and we had projects with deadlines. But we didn't have control. My parents didn't control my thoughts, my interests, or my minute-by-minute movements. They provided the scaffolding, and I did the building.
Most of what we call "structure" in school is actually just "control necessary for institutional management." It doesn't help the child; it helps the building run smoothly.
Organic vs. Industrial Structure
Industrial structure is the bell, the desk, and the syllabus. It is top-down and indifferent to the individual. Organic structure is the rhythm of the seasons, the requirements of a task, and the natural limits of our energy. Organic structure is what real adults use to get things done. When you have a job to do, the "structure" is provided by the requirements of the job, not by a manager standing over you with a whistle.
The Danger of Over-Siloing
When we over-structure a child's life, we prevent them from ever learning how to create their own structure. This is why "unstructured" time is so terrifying to parents—they fear the child will "waste" it. But the ability to decide what to do with a free afternoon is one of the most important skills a human can possess.
Structure Check
- Is the "structure" in your house helping your child learn, or helping you stay sane? (Both are valid, but they are different.)
- What happens when the external structure is removed? Does your child still know how to function?
- Can your child name the "rules" of their own learning process?
Building Scaffolding, Not Cages
Structure should be like a trellis for a vine—it gives it a direction to grow, but it doesn't force the vine to be a certain shape. Our goal as parents isn't to be the architects of our children's lives, but to provide the materials and the space for them to build their own.
As I plan to homeschool, I'm choosing a life of rhythm over a life of schedules. I want a structure that supports curiosity, not one that replaces it.